Want to break free from anger? A Guide to Emotional Liberation.
Sam is furious with Sonya, his manager, because she gives him extra work.
Sonya has been in a spiral of self-pity since her bestie boss passed away a year ago.
Simon her new director is paralyzed with fear because he is sure the company will soon tank.
What is your impression of these three?
What do they have in common?
A victim is defined as a person harmed, injured, or killed as a result of a crime, accident, or other event or action.
Another definition of a victim is one who is tricked or duped.
How fitting.
Whether real or imagined, these three are victims of their perspective.
Now let’s share the experiences of Raphiel, Raquel, and Rose.
Raphael is a tour guide with 25 pesky problems a day, but is fascinated with solving them.
Raquel lost her mom and dad last month both due to an aircraft controller mistake but has accepted it and is grieving and supporting her struggling siblings.
Rose has found out her industry she helped create will be obsolete in 6 months but is excited about the opportunity to pivot into a new lane.
What is your impression of this bunch?
What do they have in common?
They embody the essence of resilience and proactive problem-solving.
They see challenges as opportunities for development and change.
This mindset and attitude isn’t just gifted, it is earned.
The greatest battles we face are with our own thoughts and attitudes.
I believe it is insane to let others, institutions, or anything control me.
Even with this knowledge, I still struggle with my outlook at times.
How can we change our perspective?
We look at our relationships.
The most important part of a self-assessment is seeing where we are angry.
Think of a person, place, or thing you feel resentment to in the past or currently, even if it feels trivial. Write down why. Eg. Ellen is resentful at her boss because she often assigns tasks to her outside her role.
Describe how it affects you, so you can see how it affects your life. Pick from the areas of self-esteem, ambitions, your relationships, money, or security. Eg.This affects Ellen’s ambitions because she is no longer as motivated, and her money because she makes less due to poor results.
Write how you were selfish, dishonest, self-centered, or fearful and elaborate. Hint: if you are feeling an emotion like anger there is likely someway you contributed. Eg. Ellen is fearful of not taking a chance to help out in other ways. She is also being dishonest because her boss is the one in charge, not the other way around.
If you realize you did something wrong to the person, place, or thing, then admit your mistake to the person, and you will be free from your anger. Hint: there is almost always some way we contributed; many times it may not be directly related.
Ellen looked at her history of the relationship and realized she lied on her job application.
She admitted this, and that she should be chipping in more as her boss requested.
Guess what? Her boss told her the reason that she was giving her these responsibilities was because she wanted to see if she should promote her.
Due to her honesty she gave her another chance.
These outcomes look different depending on many variables
But the lesson is that if we clean our side of the street, we are free from anger.
This is an important groundwork for managing emotions.
There are more tools for letting go of fear and looking at our conduct.
If you are interested, let me know, and I’d be happy to share them with you.
In the grand scheme of things we are so insignificant.
We must accept this.
We are spiritual beings having a human experience.
I’m not Christian, but this prayer is a great example of the results of a changed perspective.
When we become an instrument of peace…
Where there is hatred, we bring love.
Where there is wrong, we bring the spirit of forgiveness.
Where there is discord, I may bring harmony.
Where there is error, I may bring truth.
Where there is doubt, I may bring faith.
Where there is despair, I may bring hope.
Where there are shadows, I may bring light.
Where there is sadness, I may bring joy.
Our ability to think, learn, communicate makes us different from all other animals.
But what I believe truly sets us apart is our ability to change.
Specifically, our ability to reprogram our programming.
We were given tools throughout our childhood and adolescence by our caregivers.
Some good, some bad.
If we yearn to grow, we can adopt a paradigm shift of our environment.
We do this through uncovering, discovering and discarding.
We find new truths.
It is hard work, and most shy away.
But those who are curious and are ready, receive rewards beyond belief.
Are you willing to live free, and in peace and harmony with others?