Step into your enemy’s shoes
In a challenging relationship, do you ever stop to think, I wonder how they feel?
If you are at odds with someone, it is critical to realize that they have a different side to the story.
They have had different life experiences.
As a result, it is their right to have their own opinion and perspective.
Try to empathize.
Look at your role and responsibility in the relationship dynamic.
Almost always we could have improved in the we have played our part which contributed to building the dynamic in this way.
If you are angry with them, even in the slightest way, you have a resentment.
If you are able to let go of your resentment, the relationship will improve.
You will then have more peace and less baggage. This will then translate to and better relationships. Not just with them, but everyone. In turn, you’ll begin to see better results in every area of life.
Here’s how to start this process:
Identify who the person is you resent and why.
Do some writing/reflection on how this resentment affects your life.
Look at the actions you took in the history of the relationship you could have improved on.
Expand on if these and see if you were being selfish, self-centred, fearful, or dishonest.
Share this with your coach and ask for feedback.
Do some writing/reflection on if this. Ask yourself: Is the kind of person you want to be?
If you are ready to let it go, approach the person and tell them the ways in which you were wrong and then ask them how you can make it better.
Listen with curiosity and empathy.
If you do this you will feel peace, love and understanding. You may have never have had an experience like this before. You will have developed a tool you can use that can become a way of life to give you freedom from behaviour you want to change.